Tips for Communicating with Your Ex During Divorce

Many people say that the key to a good marriage is good communication. The same could be said for a good divorce. When parties communicate effectively during a split, they can reach agreements more quickly and avoid costly missteps.

Here are some tips for improving communication during a divorce.

Choose your timing

The best time to bring up sensitive topics like needing money or having more parenting time is during mediation or while meeting with professionals. It is not a good idea to do it during child transfers or through social media posts.

Choose your timing carefully gives you the best chance at having a respectful, productive conversation.

Put it in writing

Verbal communication has its place during a divorce. However, if parties are contentious or often remember conversations differently, it is advisable to put everything in writing. Taking this approach can give you something to refer back to if there is confusion, and it can allow parties to review and edit their thoughts before sharing them with the other side.

There are numerous programs and apps that facilitate written communication between divorcing spouses and parents.

Speak through your attorneys

In some cases, there is no productive way for individuals to communicate. They argue, lie, or even make threats whenever they talk to their ex. They might even get physical.

Under these circumstances, it can be best to communicate through your attorney. Doing this can keep you from a dangerous, destructive situation that only makes divorce more difficult.

Don’t be afraid to walk away

If you feel yourself getting defensive, scared or angry during a discussion, take a break. This might entail hanging up the phone, stepping outside for some fresh air, or simply walking away from the computer before responding.

Giving yourself time and space to calm down can allow you to avoid emotional outbursts or statements that only make an argument worse.

Whether a divorce is amicable or combative, communication can be a hurdle that trips people up during a split. These tips can help parties overcome these challenges and focus on moving forward.

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