Important Boundaries to Set as a Divorcing Parent

On Behalf of | Jan 17, 2023 | Family Law

The divorce process can leave people feeling lost and confused, especially when there was once a sense of stability in the marriage.

If you’re considering divorce and your life is in flux, it can be hard to set and keep healthy boundaries. However, it’s boundaries that provide the framework you’ll need to get through this challenging time and, therefore, their importance should not be underestimated.

Boundaries for your children

Your children need to know they are safe and loved in the wake of your split. Having boundaries can help them understand where they fit in, reduce anxiety, and improve their emotional well-being.

Developing – and complying with – a fair custody schedule that prioritizes your child’s best interests serves as an essential boundary. This schedule can allow your child to experience a predictable routine, which can be vital during significant transitions.

Other helpful boundaries for kids can include sharing only necessary information about your divorce with them and keeping household rules as consistent as possible.

Boundaries for yourself

Taking care of yourself can be very difficult at this time, but having some boundaries for yourself can benefit you in many ways.

For instance, establishing a budget in light of your new financial circumstances can help you avoid things like overspending or missing important payments.

Taking a break from social media for a while, getting enough sleep, and prioritizing healthy habits can improve your mental health.

The boundaries you set for yourself can help you stay on track and feel grounded during an otherwise tumultuous time.

Boundaries for your ex

At one time, you and your soon-to-be-ex-spouse may have had few or no boundaries. However, during your split, establishing boundaries can be a crucial part of getting through the process, especially in high-conflict divorces. You might consider setting rules for:

  • Staying out of each other’s homes
  • Refraining from talking negatively about each other to your children
  • Communicating with each other (or not communicating)
  • Exchanging custody safely
  • Coordinating attendance at your child’s events

You can record these and other rules in a parenting plan or other agreements.

Boundaries like these can be reassuring during changes, so taking the time to create them as soon as possible can be beneficial for you, your kids and your life post-divorce.