The road to and through divorce is rarely a straight line. There are periods where things seem calm and times when there is so much happening it can be quite overwhelming.
During times when the case seems to be making little progress, some people feel uncertain about what they are supposed to do. These gray areas can trigger missteps that create more complications, so it can help to know what to do in these situations.
Divorcing spouses sometimes reconcile after filing for divorce. During these periods while the divorce is pending, there is the potential for healing and the rebuilding of relationships. However, reconciling and breaking up repeatedly can take a toll on spouses and their families. It can also create complications if the divorce does proceed and parties must determine the date of separation.
Thus, if you reconcile during a divorce, prioritize your communication. Be clear about your expectations and what you are prepared to do differently in the marriage. You might consult a marriage counselor. Some parties also create a postnuptial agreement.
Living together while divorcing
Living separately after the divorce process begins can be ideal, but it may not be an option for financial, parental, and logistical reasons.
If you and your soon-to-be-ex continue living together, set clear boundaries. You likely will have separate bedrooms, and you may need to coordinate household chores to minimize ongoing fighting. Setting and enforcing boundaries makes it easier to maintain independent lives, even while cohabitating.
The pandemic is creating unprecedented challenges for divorcing couples. People are dealing with job loss, the demands of virtual school or work, and the stress associated with staying healthy. Furthermore, as this article discusses, the divorce process itself can look different.
In this complicated environment, people make mistakes. To prevent them from derailing your divorce, talk to your attorney and seek healthy outlets to cope with stress. And remember that there is light at the end of the tunnel, both for the pandemic and the divorce.
Getting through the gray areas
Whatever gray area you may be navigating in your divorce, know that you are not alone. You can rely on your attorney, loved ones, and counselors to help you through this complicated situation. Rather than trying to force something to work, focus on being patient and doing what you can to protect yourself now and after your divorce is final.